Long Overdue Update!

I realized I haven’t even posted a “hey Cata!” post or anything like it since the release and feel like a slacker. Truth is I’ve been swamped - both in the big world outside and in the WoW world.

As much I love some of the new content Cata feels very much like a grind right now. I’m behind in my daily randoms and don’t even get me started on rep grinding.

We made a decision before the launch to sponsor one person per profession to ensure we have access to what we need within the guild as much as possible so we have everything maxed except a JC at this point and we’ll get him up there tomorrow. We bought and farmed everything possible to get us raid ready fast and about 100k later we got there!

Magmaw is down as well as the new Tol Barad boss (Does he even count? A team of drunk monkeys could handle that fight. LOL) In typical Heroic fashion we didn’t start with the easiest boss. /sigh We are looking very good to defeat Halfius (despite our luck in getting the worst combo of dragons possible) and the Tron dudes this week so yay for death.

Raiding has been more of challenge than I expected. Not the content but the raiders.
Healers have been hard to come by and the holidays sure as hell haven’t helped. Yours truly has been healing at least half the time and that definitely isn’t what the raiders expected…the ones who have been around know all too well how raids have historically gone when I haven’t tanked but thanks to a few strong players I’ve been able to step back, stare at raid frames and try not to stand in bad and let them call things out.

It also feels like a few folks are lacking the fire the rest of us expected and I feel that we are much further behind than we should be. A few changes in the roster and a new pally healer leveled and geared have helped the past couple of raid days though so there’s no reason we can’t get back on top where we need to be.

Anyways there’s the very, very brief update! Now I’m off to try to clean up the bank and come up with a system in it that works better…. Wish me luck!

Things I Learned About Leading a Guild in Wrath

You will never be able to make every single person in the guild happy all at one time but as long as you’re fair they will accept occasional disappointments.

Second chances can be very good. Third (or fourth if you’re really having a dumb moment) will bite you in the ass.

The Raid Bitch is your friend.

Guildies are friends not family. You can choose them.

They are called Huntards for a reason.

Trust your instincts. Even if they come with great experience if your gut tells you “no” then don’t accept them into the guild.

If they want to change mains more than once an expansion be very, very worried.

Your officers will either be your best assets or your worst liabilities. Choose carefully.
Elitism isn’t always a bad thing.

No matter how much you may like them personally some people will never, ever get it.

A minimum age requirement helps you stay sane longer.

It doesn’t matter how many times you say it, put it in the MOD, post it on the forums, or send them mail…there will always be people who don’t pay attention.

Landing on the Stupid Awards may become a badge of honor.

If you give them your phone number they will call or text you at ridiculous hours.

Once the focus is gone on a progression fight it’s best to just call it and go fishing until tomorrow.

The better your guild is the more trolls you have.

Psycho happens.

Emo happens.

Nerd Rage happens.

Progression isn’t worth sacrificing your code of acceptable behavior.

At the end of the day the friends you spend your time with make the guild successful and keep you going day after day even when you’re ready to disband the guild and go play Sims 3.

REM is Stuck in My Head

That's great, it starts with an earthquake, birds and snakes,
an aeroplane - Lenny Bruce is not afraid.
Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn,
world serves its own needs, dummy serve your own needs.
Feed it off an aux speak,, grunt, no, strength,
The ladder starts to clatter with fear fight down height.
Wire in a fire, representing seven games, a government for hire and a combat site.
Left of west and coming in a hurry with the furies breathing down your neck.
Team by team reporters baffled, trumped, tethered cropped.
Look at that low playing!
Fine, then.
Uh oh, overflow, population, common food, but it'll do.
Save yourself, serve yourself. World serves its own needs, listen to your heart bleed dummy with the rapture and the revered and the right - right.
You vitriolic, patriotic, slam, fight, bright light, feeling pretty psyched.

It's the end of the world as we know it.
It's the end of the world as we know it.
It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine.

Since it’s been stuck in my head I thought I’d share. Wasn’t that nice of me?


I know, I’ve been slacking on the blogging. My time in game has been less chaotic than usual so there wasn’t really much to bitch about and considering most of my posts are venting that doesn’t leave me with much fodder! I’ve been doing oodles of research on professions, classes, and whatnot on various blogs and forums but they put it all together much better than I would so more reading less writing these days. (Special shout outs to El's Extreme Anglin' and Crafter’s Tome!) Oh, and I read The Shattering and then proceeded to nag my guildies until they either read it or begged me to stop.

I’ve also been preparing my toons and my guild for Cataclysm. You know, stocking up on things we might need; stocking up on things that will be ridiculously priced before too long to sell in Cata to replenish the soon-to-depleted gbank resources; wrapping up achievements and so on. We also figured out who the crafters are for each profession that will get the first mats, biggest influx of gold to level them, and have the stamina to be NEEDED constantly once they have them up there.

Hard to believe that I’ve been 80 for two years. Let’s see…I got The Immortal title and the drake from Naxx, cleared Ulduar including Algalon and got the drake from that, cleared ICC and, yes, got the drake from that, started a raiding guild and made it to the top on the server, farmed more rep then I care to remember, leveled 6 other 80s and countless toons that may or may not survive (I hate playing melee classes!), and spent tons of time doing any number of silly, pointless, goofy, things with guildies just because I like them (GEORGIA!!!). Good times.

The one achievement we are still actively working on is getting the Lich King down on hard mode. We are close, so very close, but we need more concentrated time instead of an hour here and there. When he dies on hard mode I think I will really feel like I’ve done everything I set out to do in Wrath. Or at least everything I planned once I actually figured out what it was I wanted to do in Wrath. LOL.

I think I’m set.

Happy End of the World!

Stupid Awards of the Week

The Huntards Tranq? Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

Our dear little huntard, who after a few wipes due to the off tank dying on heroic Lich King to shambling horrors, hears me say, “He should have been able to take one of the hits if the other was tranqued and (our hunter) was doing that right…?”
And she responds with silence. Very long silence.



The Oh, The Ready Check was for Real? Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

Same huntard, same fight, same phase. Ready check green, tank says, “Board’s green, starting it.”, raiders started calling positions and events and I hear….

“(The hunter) is AFK.”

In a Shadow Trap of course.

Then we hear in vent, “Oh, we were ready? I tabbed out…I thought someone was going /afk.”

You. Hit. Yes. To. The. Ready Check! /facepalm



The WTS Man Candy for Raid Spot Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The mage who included a picture of himself (is it really? Lol) clad only in a towel with his application to the guild. We usually just ask for WWS or raid history… I wonder what he would post for epics….

I Miss Mortigan the Lock

Tonight in raid several things (which will be explained in the Stupid Awards) happened that made me really miss Mortigan the Lock's posts. For those of you who remember him you will appreciate this and those of you who don't definately need to read this.

In Mortigan's words, with full credit to him, here it is:


WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 21, 2009
How to raid ANYTHING. By Mortigan the Lock.

I find it terribly hard to remember all the nuances of each boss fight. Sorry, but I'm just not hard-core enough to memorize who casts what, and I really don't care if Pixie McNixie in the bottom of some hole is planning to fear me, sheep me, or chop me in half with a big heavy axe. Why? Because overall things are pretty much the same from one boss to the next, so I figured I could come up with a single set of rules on how to raid ANYTHING. I've appropriately named these rules "A Single Set of Rules on How to Raid ANYTHING."

Getting Ready:

Many people go to YouTube and watch Tankspot videos to familiarize themselves with the fights. This is a waste of time, because all you really need are my simple rules. Not 100% sure? Here are some additional reasons for skipping the videos:

1. Those people in the videos are ELITE WIZARDS and your raid team is not going to do anywhere near as well as them. It's like watching an Olympic gold medalist do the ski jump and then trying it yourself. Forget about it.

2. There are less steps to preparing your taxes than there are to fights like Freya. Watching Tankspot explain it on YouTube will only give you a headache. Your guild is going to wipe on it anyway, so no need to give yourself a migraine. Skip the video and use my rules below!

Let's Raid!

Ok, so here is my Single Set Of Rules On How To Raid ANYTHING:

1. DO NOT stand in anything that wasn't there before the fight started, if it visually looks dangerous. This includes fire, black steaming circles of nastiness, green slimy stuff, purple ooze, etc. If you are not sure, stand in it for a second and see if your health goes down. If it does, MOVE.

2. DEFINITELY DO stand in anything that wasn't there before the fight started, if it visually looks beneficial. This includes pleasant rays of fairy moonlight, air with lightning bug / glittery things in it, shiny sparkly spots on the floor, or anything else that a 3 year old girl might want to color. If you are not sure, stand in it for a second. If nothing bad happens, definitely keep standing it because it MUST be doing something good.

3. Do the following based on your function:

Tank: Attack the boss with everything you got. Keep doing this and don't stop until your healer drags you away screaming at you, "STOP! STOP! HE'S DEAD ALREADY!"

Heal: Keep healing until everyone is either dead and blaming you, or the boss is dead. In the latter case, it is your job to drag the tank away from the bloody corpse.

DPS: Do the same as the tank, but wait a fraction of a second before doing so. This way, if you get aggro, you can blame the Tank. Otherwise, he will blame you. That fraction of a second makes all the difference on who gets blamed for the wipe. Use it wisely. Now this next part is important: If adds arrive, you need to make a visual check of how dangerous they look. If they look like they can be ignored, stay on the boss. If they look really nasty, switch to the add. Simple! Or you can always fall back on the "watch what everyone else is doing and copy them" strategy, but I'm training you to be a trailblazer, so get in there and blaze that trail!

Off Tank: You're on the adds. Someday, if you ever become cool enough or geared enough, the guild might let you be a REAL tank. But probably not anytime soon. So stick to adds. And if you run like a madman all over the map with a trail of adds behind you, creating a hellish conga-line of death, all the DPSers are going to HATE YOU. So keep your butt in one spot, take your beating, and suck it up.

4. DO NOT stand in a Boss' AOE. The crap raining down on your head should be an obvious sign that it's time to pack up and move.

5. Should a boss fight require you to operate some sort of vehicle, land mount, or drake, randomly mash buttons as fast as the cool-downs allow. Generally, Button 1 is the biggie one to mash, so mash it more than the others. No one's really going to notice if you did well or not, so just mash, mash, mash! You're a pro!

6. If you get aggro, run TOWARD your teammates, not away from them. It's the surest way to get rid of that unwanted boss who's taken serious notice of you. Ideally, run toward (and right through) a mage. Mages are a big, big help with getting rid of aggro. If you're cool enough to be a warlock like me, you can even strategically position yourself right next to a mage throughout the fight, and Soulshatter as needed. Be sure to turn toward the mage when Soulshattering, so that you can watch the look on his face when the boss 1-shots him. If you're a mage, disregard everything I've just said, and take one for the team.

7. The laws of the universe that govern comic books, video games, and science fiction in general require that twins ALWAYS have some sort of symbiotic relationship, and a special power will CERTAINLY exist between them. Therefore, any time there are twin bosses (or even twin adds if they're extremely dangerous looking), they MUST be killed simultaneously. Very bad things happen when one twin witnesses the death of the other. Heed my warning, and kill any and all twins at the same time. Further, they cannot be allowed to touch each other or send each other any kind of glowing orb, ray beam, soothing rainbow, etc. You don't want the wonder-twins activating ANYTHING. So keep them apart, kill them apart, and do it at the same time.

If you follow these simple rules, you're sure to be a success at your next raid. I advise you to print this out and keep it handy. Review it during the boring buff periods before raiding, or when the tank if off in Dalaran begging for another healer. And be sure to stop back by and let me know how it went! Happy raiding!
Your buddy,

Mortigan the Lock

A Few Words on the 100 Mounts...

Lark finally (FINALLY) finished the grind to get 100 mounts so she can now ride around on the very pretty dragonhawk!

I’d to say a few words to my favorite rogue, thank for killing things quickly every day so I didn’t have to grind out the Argent Tournament dailies alone. And thank you for your quick engineering in Ulduar so the chopper was a bit less expensive.

To the TBC factions: I never want to see you again. That’s right Skyguard with your evil bird people in Terrokar, don’t call and don’t write. You too Kuranai and Halaa with your ogres and tinkerers and talbuks in Nagrand, we are through. I wish you luck in finding another sucker who would put up with hours and hours of farming for things that you probably don’t even use. No more powders and beads and scrolls from me. You are on your own. In the future I will go out of my way to avoid your territories when leveling alts…now stop texting and asking me when I’m coming back to see you. We are through, move on.

And, finally, to the Sea Turtle: FUCK YOU!!! I’ve fished 11490 things from pools in Northrend and you just couldn’t drop once??? What’s up with that? You dropped for people without maxxed fishing, you dropped for people who had only fished a few times, you dropped more than once for others!!! Stupid turtle…I hate you.*

So, now I just need to get my group back into Ulduar so we can do one more achievement and get our Ulduar drakes. (Hint: swirly, green clouds = bad)

With the months of grinding for my pretty bird done I’ve had time to spend on other things like my Holy Pally on another server who I got to Northrend this week. She spends a lot of time in BGs and ,whatever they say about holy paladins right now, she rocks! Call me a masochist if you like but she’s been holy with very few moments of weakness from the start and it’s nice that we can actually kill things a little faster now. I’ve tried ret a few times at different levels but just can’t seem to get the hang of it. I think it’s a basic resentment that as melee you have to chase crap around to hit it. She will go tanky with her duel spec on occasion when the series of DK tanks queuing for randoms becomes too painful but she really is a healer at heart.

So now on to basic guild maintenance things like cleaning the bank out, trying to figure out what we’re missing for balanced raiding in Cata, and hitting /love everytime I come across a critter in case it’s one of the ones I’m missing.


*I still want you...please drop!

Stupid Awards of the Week

The But There’s a Tree for It Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The mage who informed me that Frost is a viable raiding spec.
He went fire again very shortly after that statement.


The Nerd Raging Loot Whore Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The ret pally who showed up to raid in holy gear/spec and then decided to heal without telling me despite the fact that he was A. in the DPS group, B. not listed when I named the healers for the night, C. not needed as a healer, and D. had never healed in any raid I’d ever run and given his lackluster performance as DPS would not have been asked to heal. He then proceeded to roll on a healing ring against MS healers and nerd rage when he won the roll and didn’t get the ring….because it was his OS. He stated that he didn’t need anything for his ret set and that’s why he was healing - for the gear. I replaced him and he /gquit. I should have kicked him one of the many other times he showed up on the Stupid Awards. /Sigh.


The What’s Aggro? Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The lock that died. That died a lot. The lock who died a lot because he didn’t listen to the tank clarify the aggro changes. (**edit: I was just reminded this need to be co-awarded to a certain chicken!)


The Hiding from the GM Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The priest who has not logged on his toons since I told him I wanted to speak with him. I guess he knows he’s in trouble...like I’m going to forget if he hides for a few days. Pfft.


The Illiteracy Sucks Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

Everyone who whispered me, cornered me in vent, or sent me ingame mail asking what our plans were for Cataclysm after the post went up on our forums, my blog, and was the sole subject of the guild’s message of the day. You make me want to redirect all my energy into reading programs for nerds.


The Illiteracy Sucks MOAR Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

Everyone who did not do their homework on what the patch did and now has stupid questions they should know the answer to and proceeds to announce their slackiness to the world in gchat and trade chat.

The End of an Era

Well, we finally called an end to progression raiding today. Attendance was getting worse and focus even flakier. I'm mostly feeling like the elephant that has been sitting on my head has moved. And a little bit nostalgic. But anyways, this is what was posted tonight on our guild forum. Bring on the change!


Dear Heroic,

With an official release date of December 7 it is time to get organized for Cataclysm!

It’s been a great time in Wrath and I’m really proud of what we’ve done. We went from nothing on the server to number one and you should all be proud of that. We will be taking the best of what we learned and improving on it in Cataclysm and I can’t wait to see what we can do!

Some folks left to pursue other options and we were fully aware that our partnership with the Aberration raiders was for Wrath content. We wish them all the best and they left on good terms and we will not tolerate bashing of them in trade chat or the forums.

Some more of you I know are leaving to pursue other opportunities, some of you I have spoken with and know you are staying, and there are a whole lot of you that I would like to know about as soon as possible.

If you are unsure of your position in Heroic as we transition please don’t hesitate to talk to me. Not everyone who was here for Wrath will be here for Cataclysm. It’s very important that we have a team that is committed to raiding and to the guild and its members. We most definitely wanting the best fit as well as the best raiders. The expectation for our members will be rapid leveling of your main character and the toon’s professions so we can dive right into the new raid content. It is imperative that you do thorough research on your new abilities and whatnot so you are an expert on your toon as quickly as possible.


Here’s what you need to know from us:

• We will be reducing the size of the guild to better focus on 2 initial 10 man raiding teams. That means a guild of about 25-30 raiders with a very, very small amount of non-raiding friends. This will allow us to have flexibility with raid schedules and find the best combinations of classes, specs and personalities. This will also allow us to join the teams together to complete 25 man content if and when we choose to. The main focus will be on 10s at first unquestionably.

• We will be raiding ICC on a more casual basis up until Cata hits but raids will be on the calendar if I am running them and may not always be Tues/Wed…feel free to start your own - yes, I know you want your mounts! When patch 4.0.1 drops we will be limited to either 10 OR 25 per week and it will become nearly impossible to raid that content as a guild. We will make every attempt to finish Ulduar 25 for those mounts and to get into ToGC at least once if that is what you all want to do. Please remember, even if you don’t care about the mounts or achievements your guildies do and they need your help.

• For Cata, we are prepared to help level professions and get every raider geared as quickly as possible. The guild has gold and will spend it to help make that happen! On that note, the bank access has been reduced and guild repairs will be open only for limited times until we sort out exactly what we are doing and implement it.


What we need to know from you:

• Are you interested in staying in Heroic?

• If you are interested in staying are you changing mains or main specs?

• Is there anything you want to see done differently in the guild when we move into the new content?

• Is there anything left in Wrath that is going away that you would like to accomplish that you need assistance with? (No, I will not buy you a chopper.)

We are excited about the new content and look forward to raiding with many of you in December! For those that leave us we wish you the best.


Love,

Lark

Yay for a Cata Date!

Well, finally have the date for release! Now my OCD can fully kick in with my anal retentive brain and I can finally PLAN!

Bring on the guild overhaul...well sort of. LOL

OMG must get Ulduar mounts now!

I'll fill you in with more soon!

When Applying to a Guild...

Dear Applicant,


While we appreciate your interest in Heroic please understand we are at the end of Wrath and we’re planning for Cataclysm so unless you blow us away there is no point in adding you to a roster we are planning on trimming. You might want to consider that when thinking about doing any of the following:

Repeatedly whispering the GM or any of the class officers while they are in a raid…especially once they have told you they will talk to you later. Raid > you.

When told an online application is the first step in the process responding with, “do i have 2? : (“. Yes, yes indeed you do have to…and from you we will expect particularly detailed answers.

We really created the application with you in mind so you could pick and choose which questions to answer. Please don’t feel you need to give us an accurate, thorough answer to any of them if you don’t feel like it. Just go ahead and put “Cuz (insert class/spec) r leet” anywhere you choose to skip. /sarcasm

This is bad. “Why did you choose the main spec/off spec you have?”
“paladin ret/holy i chose cause i noticed holy gear dropped all the time and i chose ret cause i wanted to be dps”

Worse: “paladin, retribution, 5964(may be higher by now) gearscore
cause pallys are overpowered:P”

You were on board when told that everyone who applies starts in the Friday ICC 25 and that we are absolutely, positively, under no circumstances recruiting you into the main T-Th group. You stated this would be “perfect” and you just want to raid sometimes. You expressed immense love for the Friday idea…until we asked you to pick a Friday for a trial run and you said, “Well, I’m free on Tuesday or Wednesday but I can’t raid Fridays.” Huh?

You attend the trial run on Friday and proceed to talk over the raid leader explaining how you would do the fights and what you saw in videos when you looked them up. Sadly, your failure to ever down the boss we are discussing makes you less than credible. Mmm hmm…go on….

You don’t realize that:
Attending the trial run and being AFK for every ready check is bad.

Attending the trial run and insulting the other players is bad.

Attending the trial run having absolutely no idea what the bosses do is bad.



Good luck!

Woot! Dead Heroic Putricide!

The title really says it all.

Weeks of wiping and frustration and tonight it was a one-shot deal.

Happiness.

Nostalgia for Noobishness

Before World of Warcraft I had played things like Sims (Original, expansions, Xbox and PC…and before you ask, yes, I had the little extra expansions with things like kitchen furniture and pets.), Grand Theft Auto (I was really good at the driving but sucked at being a pimp.), and various sports related games (boys hate it when you beat them at hockey by the way). I picked up WoW on my way home from work at the beginning of a long weekend because I had no real plans, the weather was crappy, and I’d heard a few people at the office talk about it. I didn’t sleep for about 36 hours.

WoW was fascinating! Nothing I had played had ever been even remotely like it. I had no idea how to do simple things like move, open bags, and swim. I didn’t know about class trainers or flight masters. I was scared to death to die because I didn’t know what would happen and then when I did die it took me forever to figure out how to resurrect. (There was one very memorable death involving falling off a cliff into Wetlands at level 14 and taking three hours to get back to safety because I couldn’t find my body easily and didn’t know how to use the spirit rez.) I can still remember the first time I had 50 silver because the cat lady’s charge is something like 37 silver for a pet and I really wanted one but it seemed like a lot of money at the time.

While I spent a lot of time wandering lost in circles (my friends will tell you I still spend a lot of time lost but don’t listen to them…they don’t take their meds…crazy people) I was completely fascinated with the look and feel of the game. There was that thrill of discovery everything I found a new place; whether it was as grand as the world dragon in Duskwood or as small as accidentally catching a prize fish from the STV Fishing Derby it didn’t matter. There was the fun and challenge of leveling Lark and learning about what paladins can do, vanilla, TBC, and Wrath to explore and a myriad of alts to level and learn about. One of the most fun leveling times I’ve had was getting my horde mage to 80 and doing all the areas I’d loved from the other perspective.

And the people! Let’s not forget the people! I remember the first WoW friend I made. Manius was leveling a lock and we met at about level 8 and leveled together on and off on various toons for years. Countless toons and two main servers since I still talk with him whenever I’m on Drenden and can catch him. One of my other oldest WoW friends is raiding with me now. (/wave Zaka). Many of the key people in Heroic have been around for long time and the guild wouldn’t be the same without them. The game wouldn’t be the same without the people I’ve known.

Most of my time for the last two-plus years has revolved around raiding and the goals therein, or, in the last year or so raiding plus my guild. There are a few things I still want to achieve in Wrath: getting us our 25 man ICC mounts (got my ugly, bony birdie from 10 man on Sunday!), killing Putricide and Sindragosa on hard mode in 25 man (and giving at least a few honest shots at LK hard), and wrapping up the Ulduar 10 and 25 metas for those mounts (most of us are ridiculously close…it’s just silly we haven’t finished at this point). But mostly…I think I’m about done.

I’m ready for Cataclysm. I’m ready for the excitement of new things to see and do and learn. I’m ready to relearn all the classes and specs on Lark and the alts. I can’t wait to have the time to level a new toon from scratch and see how the leveling has changed and do the new quests. And, I think, I’m finally ready to take my little guild into the new content and make it a success there as well. It won’t be the same but I think it will be good.

I’ve flirted with other MMOs since I found WoW; Warhammer, EVE, AOC, and a few others but they couldn’t hold my attention for long. Either they were too buggy or didn’t have enough players or they simply weren’t interesting to me. However, I recently started the Final Fantasy XIV beta and that may have potential! That’s really where this wave of nostalgia for newness comes from. The game is visually stunning and very interesting so far. I have to learn from scratch what to do, where to go and what the classes mean since I never touched any of the other Final Fantasy incarnations. I still haven’t figured out how to start a profession and it’s driving me crazy. LOL. At any rate, it may give me something to do until Cataclysm comes out and WoW feels new again.

SOS! Mayday! Help! Drowing GM!

So, the general flakiness and lack of focus (and attendance) in many of our core raiders has me thinking. I’ve been putting off making decisions about what I’d like the guild to look like in Cataclysm but I might need to start thinking seriously about it. It seems that the end-of-expansion blues are starting to hit and a passion for raiding starting to wane in many people. While this is understandable to a point and I certainly expected it the reality is it sucks. We haven’t completed the progression I know we are capable of and I’m not sure we will unless I can figure out a way to get the raiders more motivated. It’s a tough situation to be in right now. We have many that want to finish what we started but just a few key people taking a mental and/or physical break completely screws us and fully pisses off the people that want to raid. (I’m getting more than a few /rage whispers during wipes on dumb shit. Trust me, folks, I feel your pain.)

I’m not entirely sure what the options are right now. Do we reduce the raid nights to put less “pressure” on folks that are starting to drift? If we do that it means extending timers on occasion to get to some progression - not sure how that would go over, lol. Do we take a break from progression and focus on the achievements needed to get the mounts? I can see where that might drive focus and attendance at least temporarily since only one person doesn’t care about mounts (Yes, I know you don’t care about achievements! Stop telling me!) I’ve pretty much ruled out recruiting at this point unless someone omguberamazing applies since we are tired of breaking in new raiders. I can pull from the Friday casual raid but then they are short and, frankly, there’s a reason most of them aren’t in the main group (sorry but it’s true) and the few that would be good there are either couples who insist on raiding together (have I mentioned how much I hate that?) or people with iffy schedules.

Damned if I know at this point…I just want to see a few more hard mode bosses down, get my mount, and then I’ll do whatever the group wants!


Anyways, back to Cataclysm. I was fondly hoping in a knowingly delusional way that they would change something…ANYTHING…to make 25s more appealing. Sorry, Blizz, but more of the same loot isn’t going to cut it for a lot of people. Personally, I like 25s soooo much more than 10s. I can understand the appeal of a close-knit group, less trouble to organize, blah, blah, blah. I don’t care. I still think it’s dumbing down raiding even more and catering to the casuals too much. 10s just lack the epic feel of 25s and I will miss that if they aren’t really do-able anymore. I don’t need to rehash the whole post…you can go look at it if you want to read the full rant.

So, for Cata here’s what I need to start figuring out….

Who wants to stay in the guild regardless of the raid size?

Who will stay if it’s one size or the other and which size would that be?

Who is definitely leaving to do their own thing?

If we stay a mainly 25 man raiding guild what will we need to recruit?

Who is changing mains/main specs?

If we become a 10 man guild (ugh, I think I’m nauseous) who do I want on the team?

And is it more than one 10 man team?

I think I’m narrowing down what I’d like to see just a bit. I’m thinking I’d like to reduce the size of the guild to about 30 people or so and be able to do three 10s and yet still be able to save a raid for 25s here and there. Once we get the feel for the content we may find that the appeal of more loot in 25s is a factor to gear for hard modes. That means we need 6 tanks, 9 healers, 15 well mixed DPS, and a whole lot of off-specs!


Anyone out there care to share what their guild is planning? Help! Please!

Annoyed

Dear Guildies,


If you wish your GM to retain at least some semblance of sanity please do not do any of the following:

Be absent when you accept on the calendar (if you’re going to take a nap, set the damn alarm!).

Delete the calendar invite (do you think I don’t notice?).

Regem after a ready check has been issued.

Forget how to kill the Lich King. ‘Nough said.

Feel that you MUST respond to everything that is said no matter what…seriously, I don’t need to hear your bigger-badder-better story or witty (at least in your mind) comment.

Tell me you need 15 minutes and then never come back on.

When I ask why you died don’t tell me the long, drawn out story about your life beginning with kindergarten…I don’t care and all I’m looking for is a 3-4 word sentence.

If you die on a fight you do not need to talk unless you have something vital to the raid to say.

Feel that you and you alone do not need to participate in loot council discussions despite the fact that it is the biggest thing you do as an officer.

Insist I get in vent and then tell me you have nothing to talk about.

Click yes on the ready check and then scream, “no wait!” as I start the countdown.

Let your artificially inflated ego interfere with reality and the raid. You may not completely suck but you’re not as good as you think you are.

Think you can use the gbank as your personal stash of goodies. Yes, you are ranked an alt now for a reason. Good luck getting back your rank.

Put your children in a wood chipper while push to talk is pressed. It hurts my ears.



Much love,

Lark

Stupid Awards of the Week ***Special Pally Edition!***

The Who, Me? Selfish and Clueless? Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The ret pally who decided to bail on the guild’s ICC run to buy a run from the individual who tried to destroy our guild and whose lies and BS in trade, says, and the forums we are still trying to clean up on the server. Really?!!? And you don’t think this will upset all the people he slandered? How dumb are you? Never mind…don’t answer that…we already know.


The Really I Like Paying My Own Repair Bills Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The officer ret pally who moved me to the AFK channel in vent repeatedly during boss explanations; he now has no vent admin privileges. He then demoted all my alts; he got demoted to a special rank. Next he filled the bank with 172 blacksmith hammers; his special rank can no longer see the bank tabs. The rank Special Snowflake wasn’t quite right for all that…it’s now FUTimmeh.


The Prot Heals FTW Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The pally tank, who shall remain nameless, (*cough*) who went heals for Saurfang and didn’t realize until the event was started that while she changed her gear, flask and food she didn’t actually change her spec.


The Growth Spurt Made Me Do It Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The ret pally who was supposed to raid lead last Friday’s 2nd 25 ICC and decided to stop playing WoW on Thursday night. He spends a lot of time in game for someone who quit…we’re pretty sure there’s a girl involved. Damn hormonal teens.


The No, Really, I’m Legit Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The pally/hunter who applied to the guild with great enthusiasm talking about how much he wanted to be here and how bad his current guild is. Silly pally didn’t think that I would hear from guildies he only wanted to join to get the Kingslayer title and then planned on leaving. Seriously, do people think no one tells me anything?

WTB a Guild Secretary

So I’m back to balancing work and WoW, have been for a few weeks now, and while the paycheck is both welcome and necessary I’m definitely feeling the impact of less time with my guild.

Here’s my question: Do other GMs and raid leaders out there find that when they are not around things just don’t get done?

The second 25 man group hasn’t run in two weeks because I worked on both Fridays. There were people all set to run it and others to help make it happen. Didn’t happen. Some of it may have been people on vacation, I know another officer recently started a new job also, we may have saved too many to our main 25 but still…. With the number of geared 80 alts in this guild I find it hard to believe we couldn’t have managed it all. Is my proactive nagging really that necessary?

The bank is also a mess. Access is limited but others could certainly move things around or remove one or two of the 74 blacksmithing hammers one delightful raider decided to put in there. I’m also not seeing the gold that should be deposited for flasks and whatnot - partly because the log is eaten so fast due to grepairs - and I’d like to think someone is keeping an eye on it other than me but….

And then there’re the daily little soap operas. I’m pretty sure I don’t know the half of what’s going on right now and that there’s no one keeping up on them so they can tell me before chaos breaks out.

Don’t get me started on the applications that are pending. Just don’t ask. Really. Don’t.

Is it just me? Does anyone have a solution? Can I hire a secretary?

Raid Bitch Ramblings

The Raid Bitch is tired and just wants to make everyone tea and cake and watch them all get long. Don’t get me wrong, if you piss me off I can have a temper. I get annoyed and frustrated and snap at people when shit goes wrong. The Raid Bitch is not particularly warm and fuzzy when the Stupid Debuff is on the raid. I have very little patience for stupid questions or pointless whining and that is why there is a Special Snowflake rank. Trolls in trade…don’t get me started….

But I hate being the bad guy sometimes…particularly the one who has to decide, and more apropos to this the one who has to communicate, who sits and who is in when there are 30 good options for a 25 man raid. Not to mention the other 10 sitting there that aren’t the best of options. This is one of the things I do regularly that is both the best and worst of situations to be in. Best because it’s great that we have three extremely capable, reliable trees; worst that we only need two in raid and someone needs to sit. Or when we have 12 melee and need to bring in ranged. Or when we have 4 fury warriors and, well, that’s just silly. I do think that most understand that raid make-up trumps all else. It’s still no fun to sit though - particularly when it’s on a boss you really want a drop off of. Very few of them complain about being subbed out and I appreciate that. What’s worse than complaining though is when they take it to heart as a sign they are failing. And worse than that is sometimes I have to explain that while they aren’t exactly failing there are performance issues that need to be addressed and they may be at the bottom of the damage meters in a group of heavy hitters. Can we just have cake now?



On a lighter note, here’re a few things you can do to entertain yourself in raid!

Fun with Fury! Bribe your hunter to misdirect the biggest mobs in the trash to the fury warrior. See how many times you can make him die before he refuses to accept the rez until all the trash is cleared. Once you kill the boss and move onto the next trash set your paladins up with a bubble rotation so he finishes every charge unable to do damage. Mix the misdirects with the bubbles for the rest of the night.

Reset Recount right before the trash that leads to Blood Queen when boomkins are Starfalling their fluffy little hearts out and then use those numbers for the bite order. It makes the boomkins feel good to think they can come out on top. Sad locks and mages being mocked by chickens.

Clear the Plague wing trash then decide you don’t have the right raid make-up for Putricide hardmode and tell everyone to go to Ruby Sanctum. Then go back to ICC and kill Sindragosa. Racking up those frequent flier miles FTW.

The King is Still Dead Long Live the Loot...errr, What?

So with the pretty much everything easy on regular or hard mode (except 25 Putricide and Sind and the king himself on heroic) and Lich King a farm boss now a couple of things have happened.

First, certain people, who shall remain nameless (*cough* Huhs *cough*) have decided that there is no better fun in raid than to BoP the tank when she pulls large packs of mobs. Good times. WTB chain MDs to the ret pally pst with price.

This also frees up the option of selling the Kingslayer title. Let’s see…25k divided by 10 or 25…. With of course a nice chunk for the gbank.

It also means the alts are getting a LOT of love. My little druid hit 80 last week and, spoiled baby that she is, had some lovely presents waiting for her. Then in our Friday casual/alt run we were very short healers so I brought her in. I had no intention of bringing her in until she was at least out of all her blues but some heals are better than none. Can I just say, OMG druids are OP! She held her own. (Of course a couple of lucky drops and the 18k Lark poured into her gear didn’t hurt!)


On another note, we have some dissention in the Friday run too that we need to deal with. Loot, of course. Does anything cause bigger headaches than shiny purple pixels?

Here’s the thing, it would be impossible to run it without alts and most of the mains will seldom be brought into the main run so what do you do about gear? Mains over alts is pretty standard BUT if you can’t do it without the alts then doesn’t that make them as important as mains for that run? We are in danger of losing several alts if the run gives them nothing but scraps and if that happens then no one gets loot - not mains, not alt…no one. Unless of course they want to PUG it but that will be a real crap shoot for loot and few PUGs get past the first 6 bosses.

So, what’s a GM to do?

Buy Q-Tips

Dear Guildies,


Clearly that is a gap between what I am saying and what you are hearing. I’m unclear where the misunderstanding lies…I don’t have an accent, I don’t stutter, my mic works, the officers hear me very well and you do too when it’s time for loot.

When I state very clearly at the beginning of raid that we are working on progression fights and will be basing the raid group on what we think is the best combination of specs, skill, raid awareness and experience this is NOT your cue to whisper me to tell me what loot you need and why you should be in on the off chance it drops. This is NOT your cue to whisper me and tell me that Bertha wants in and you’re happy to sit for her even though Bertha is not half the player you are and has not earned the spot. This is NOT your cue to tell me that you’d really like to DPS instead of heal because you’ve dying to see what you can do on this boss. During progression I don’t care what you need or want from a boss or care about stroking your fragile little ego. I care about one thing: Dead Boss.

When I repeat multiple times during your interview - MULTIPLE TIMES - that recruiting is closed for the main Tues/Wed 25, you WILL NOT be in it, you will ONLY be considered for the Friday casual/alt run and then ask you if that interests you, make you sleep on it, repeat said conditions again the next day how does it happen that you ask me on Tuesday if you will be in raid tonight? Short of coming to your house, dragging you out and down the street to the tattoo parlor and having them engrave it on your forearm I don’t really understand how I could be clearer.

When I say in gchat, vent and the message of the day that we will either be doing RS25 or ICC 10s on Thursday why do you whisper me asking what we are doing on Thursday? Does no one read the MOD? Or Gchat? Or listen in vent? This is almost as bad as when we start our main ICC 25 which has the same people by and large every week, put the tanks in group one where they always are, mark them as tanks in the raid frames and you ask me who the tanks are. /facepalm

Check the batteries in your hearing aids, turn down the Eminem, pay attention.


Much love,


Your Annoyed GM

Rambling Updates

So here’s where we are this week. Go ahead, grab a drink, sit back, and marvel at the weirdness.

Sanity has (mostly) returned and the 2nd 25 man has been officially deemed a casual/alt run. Yes, mains will still have priority on main spec gear but (BUT!) only if they show up consistently. Yup, that’s right. If you’re one of those who shows up one night out of three you’ll be rolling against yet one more unnecessary DK alt for those tanking legs because they are here all the time and you aren’t. Deal with it. We’ve also reduced it to one official night. I’m not pulling teeth to pull together a Monday run anymore. If people want to raid and show up we will otherwise go in Scarlet Monastery. In all honesty I think it’s pretty much dead so, meh, more free time.

The main group is still going strong. We cleared ICC 25 with 8 hard modes plus Ruby Sanctum in two nights. My fond hope is that we can spend some time on more new hard modes this week. This leads to part of the…ummm…interesting situation this week which is incorporating more of the formerly group two raiders into the main group. Subbing in and out slows things down - which sucks - but hopefully we can make it fast. The bigger trouble is that the new hard modes (and some of the ones we can’t quite consider farm yet) are spread out throughout the instance so it’s not like we can sub in based on wing. We need who we need for the new stuff. Also, there are some conversations to be had that I’m not really looking forward to. Everyone thinks they are good enough for the progression fights but, frankly, if you’ve shown up on the Stupid Awards lately for performance issues…well…not so much.

The biggest thorn in my side right now is dissention in the ranks. There is still somewhat of a lingering feeling of Us and Them in regards to folks from the guild that merged with us. Everyone needs to make compromises to have this be successful long term and change is not always a bad thing. Some of the raiders that have been with us a while are grumbling about the new folks not being quite as…diplomatic and gentle as we were in the past. To which I say, Bullshit. There is nothing that has been said in a raid that I did not say myself when the Raid Bitch came out to play…I think they are just slightly resentful to hear it from new officers and not me. I’m afraid they’re going to have to deal with it and adapt. Progression for 25 people trumps the thin-skin of one or two. There have also been complaints about the content of conversations in gchat. Particularly those filled with sexual innuendo or - in one certain warlock’s case - the RPing of homo-erotic fantasies. (Seriously, it’s actually quite funny how well thought out they are!) All I can say is there is /ignore for a reason and this has always been an adult guild filled with raunchy humor. The new folks didn’t start it. It was here before. Let’s move on.

Part of the desire to nail down a few more hard modes is another part of the weirdness of the week. Due to the collapse of the number one guild on the server…we are, by default, number….one. Wow. Just wow. I want to get more hard modes though so it feels earned rather than defaulted. We are only three behind where the former first guild was so it should be do-able. /fingerscrossed

On a happy note my little druid hit 80 last night! She is soooo spoiled it’s not funny. We had 264 BOE shoulders and a belt sitting in the gbank that no one wanted and she stepped right into those with 264 crafted legs and boots. Add a few crafted 245s and she’s not looking too bad. All it cost was Mama Lark parting with 10k to the gbank.

For a complete change of subject, I like add-ons. I don’t just want the basics you absolutely have to have either. I want the best. I want the one that does buffs, the one that communicates BQ’s bite order, and the one that changes my screen so most of my add-ons don’t sit on top of the game. Add-ons, to me, are tools; I am not using two sticks to start a fire if I have a Zippo available to me. I’m really annoyed by the “purists” who say people who use add-ons are as good. If I could find an add-on that would do laundry my life would be complete.

Stupid Awards of the Week

The Sacrificial Lamb Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The ret pally who repeatedly (yes, repeatedly) ran TOWARDS the orange ooze on Putricide. We did not down any bosses that night unless he died in the first minute. Seriously.


The Amnesia Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The resto druid who, when asked to go Boomkin, says on any fight - including Faction Champs - that she has healed over and over and over again, “I’ve never DSPed this fight…now what do I do?” I can see maybe (MAYBE) having a question if you go from say priest to rogue on Sindragosa but really unless you have amnesia you ought to be able to do farm content when going from heals to caster. /facepalm


The You Hurt My Epeen Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The Mage that got demoted to Special Snowflake for trying to kill the raid group - yes, on purpose, with forethought - and then had a temper tantrum about his rank and refused to raid until it was “fixed”. There’s a reason you were a Special Snowflake and you just made it more appropriate. /golfclap



The Gullible Isn’t in the Dictionary Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The pally who was told that to leave an arena team you typed: /gquit 2v2. And he did. He is also a Special Snowflake.

Stupid Awards of the Week

The Story Time Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

A warrior, a tree, and a ret pally who seem to be incapable of sneaking off to pee or grab a drink or whatever it was without spending an additional two minutes prior to the actual AFK to tell us in great detail why they must step away. I don’t care! Just go! You could have been back in the time it took you to explain why you needed to go!


The Magellan Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The ret pally who asked for a summons back to ICC after a wipe. He was in Dalaran. No, he didn’t hearth. He…took…the…wrong…portal…. Wait. What?! How do you take the wrong portal and wind up in Dal instead of the Upper Spire…? They’re not even close…how do you…but…wait, what….!? /headdesk


The Ass-fire is Bad? Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The kitty that sat in melee with purple fire coming out of his ass and then ran through as many of the healers as possible. Not once, not twice, but every freaking time he got it. All I can figure he was mesmerized by BQ’s fangs.


The BQ’s Bitch Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The hunter who got mind controlled every single solitary time he was due to bite someone. Every time. Every single time on Friday. And then Monday, learned to use shift+V. Voila! Success! /facepalm


The You Clearly Didn’t Want it That Bad Award of the week goes to…

/drumroll

The mage who linked for an item a good 4 minutes after the loot had been decided. His excuse? He was dead. Cause you can’t see raid chat when you’re dead…?

Sanity Check, Please?

As I mentioned not long ago we started a second 25 man ICC 25. Okay, the thought process behind starting a second 25 man group went something like this:

We merge with another guild that brings 12 new raiders over - mostly extremely competent, well-geared, experienced raiders.

This means that we now have 12 of our established raiders with no raid spots - about half of whom are solid and half of whom don’t belong in progression as much as I may like them.

So, do we sub in and out in raids to a ridiculous degree slowing everything down? Neglect the raiders and see them leave (and trust me, there’s no where good for them to go on this server)? Or do we start a second 25 man team to give them a place to work on gear, skill up and potentially earn a spot in the main run? You guessed it. We started the second 25.

So then, we run the second 25 with about 16 mains and the rest alts. We get another 9 people from another server for that group so - theoretically - we have 25 mains to run. Theoretically. Because you know what happens right….? That’s right, real life stuff and D/Cs happen so back in come the alts.

Now the folks that play the alts don’t want to run in the second 25 and want their own 25 man alt run because in the second 25 mains get priority for gear (I know, duh, right?).

So here we are on the third week of doing the second 25 and it’s an hour before invites go out. I have 23 mains accepted on the calendar, a bunch that chose tentative and the lazy bastards who can’t be bothered to look at the calendar and let us know what they are doing. And I’m wondering who is going to show up.

Seriously, what was I thinking?!?!?!

Happy Birthday the King is Dead!

Heroic is having its first birthday on Monday! I think the Lich King down was my present….yes, we finally killed Arthas!

I find it hard to believe it’s been a year and at the same time it’s hard to remember what the game was like before Heroic.

I’m so proud of the people in my guild. While no one is perfect and everyone has their moments, overall they are truly decent human beings who will bend over backwards to help one another, protect each other, and look out for the interests of the guild as a whole. We set out a year ago to form a guild that was different from the typical raiding guild. We chose to value character over raw numbers. We chose to include rather than exclude people of all backgrounds and not tolerate racial comments and the hate-filled chat that is so prevalent in this game. We set out to prove that we could do things differently and still kill the big, bad bosses…and we did. With our latest raid we are now the second highest guild on the server that is raiding 25 man content.

Out of a sense of perverse nostalgia I went back over the roster of all the members who have ever been in Heroic and realized a few things:

First, we made good choices overall in the people we invited to join us. We have retained a lot of people that have been with us for 6, 8, 10, even 12 months and I can’t imagine having this guild without them. Most of the people we lost that we considered friends were lost to real life and other interests and not to another guild or for guild policy reasons and would welcome them back with open arms.

Second, the few we lost (and I use the term loosely) to other guilds or for acrimonious reasons have largely not been missed all that much and didn’t do the damage they hoped to do when they tried to bad mouth us after they left. And, I’m betting, more than a few are kicking themselves today.

Lastly, there are two that I really miss having around. They know who they are. When one pulls her head out of her ass she’s welcome back. The other will be welcome back when a certain someone pulls his head out of his ass and quits being so freaking stubborn and selfish and gives the thumbs up.


On another note, we started a second 25 man group last week and this week brought over nine more people to flesh it out and have it rely far less on alts. It sounds (and feels) a little crazy but with the guild merger the choice was to kick or neglect a lot of good players or do so much subbing in and out that we would be crawling through progression. On this server, this close to the next expansion, there aren’t a lot of options that wouldn’t involve anyone that leaves taking many, many steps backwards or being at the mercy of assholes. I just couldn’t do that to loyal guildies so here we are with a second group! Honestly, I’m kind of excited about it and think the folks that transferred will be a great addition.

Oh, one last thing, just because this is largely a love letter to my guild don’t think the ranting posts will stop!


Lark

Self-awareness is a Beautiful Thing

Dear Guildies.

Heroic is about to go through some very interesting changes when it comes to competition for raid spots. Frankly, I’m thrilled and can’t wait. Because I care and want the best for my guild I thought I would take a few minutes to enlighten you on some of the things that go through my mind when making raid spot decisions. These decisions, when made properly, lessen the likelihood that the Raid Bitch will come out to play.

In addition to checking for the Stupid Debuff there are many factors in deciding who is a core raider, who is an acceptable raider, and who is (or should be) on their way to a happy new home elsewhere. Obviously I can say performance and attendance are the two biggest things to help me make that decision but I do factor in all sorts of things you may not think I notice when it comes to what comes out of your mouth.

For the raider the completely lacking in self-awareness here are a few things to think about whether you are in my guild or moving on to another guild:


When raid invites go out do you:

A. Accept the invite, park yourself at the instance, grab a drink or whatever you need to do, and wait for the direction to zone in?

B. Tell the raid leader you need a few more minutes to finish your fishing daily but you are ready to go as soon as that’s done?

C. Tell the raid leader you’re going to squeeze in a quick OS3D but you’ll let them know when you’re ready? *



When raid invites go out are you:

A. Online, on your main, de-grouped, ready to accept?

B. Late?

C. On an alt in another guild’s raid? **



When placed on stand-by on a regular raid night do you:

A. Gracefully zone out and either stay in raid or in vent and keep yourself occupied ready to come in when needed?

B. Whisper the raid leader repeatedly listing all the gear you need off the next several bosses (or the entire instance including hard modes both 10 and 25 in some cases) and complaining that it’s not fair because you didn’t get the trinket last week?

C. Have a hissy fit, tell the raid leader you’ll see them next Tuesday, and log off?

D. /Gquit?



When you are placed on stand-by for a progression fight do you:

A. Honestly assess your current gear/performance/attendance, look at the raid composition, comprehend that there are only 25 spots in a 25 man raid and realize that the raid leader is doing what she feels is best and there is probably a very good reason for that fact that you are sitting?

B. Whine about how you needed the badges and possible upgrades without quite grasping the fact that because you need those things you really shouldn’t be in this particular fight since there are raiders on that are better prepared for the content?

C. /Gquit and bash the guild in trade chat?



When talking about your current spec do you:

A. Fully explain why you are talented, gemmed, etc. the way you are and back it up with facts and numbers?

B. Explain that you copied it from a player who out DPSed you in VOA?

C. Say that your friend put in your talent points for you and “they are totally good at playing this class”? ***



When you screw up and wipe the raid do you:

A. Look at combat logs and know what happened, own up to errors you made, and apologize?

B. Blame lag?

C. Blame the healers?

D. Blame the tanks?

E. Blame the hunter?

F. DC and fake a power outage?



When you screw up repeatedly on the same exact freaking thing to the point where we name the error after you for all future raids in which anyone does the same stupid thing do you:

A. Understand why you are on stand-by and work to improve your performance?

B. Blame lag?

C. Send the GM many pages of in-game mail complaining about how you are being unfairly picked on?

D. /Gquit and bash the guild in trade chat?



When you are placed in a raid with another raider of comparable gear, the same talents, and very similar experience and you are out healed, tanked, or DPSed by them do you:

A. Hit the websites for theory crafting and tips to see if there’s something you missed and ask the other raider what their secret is and pick up a few things to try?

B. Talk to your class leader and ask for advice?

C. Blame your gear anyways?

D. Blame lag?

E. This never happens to you because you don’t run a damage meter because you don’t think meters are important since it’s just a game and you play it to have fun and you can’t understand why we are having trouble on the boss and keep hitting the enrage timer and the only reason you showed up tonight was because you want the trinket that drops and since you are such a fantastic human being and raider you’re certain it will be given to you even though you only show up on Tuesdays. ****



When the GM tells you that you need to stop talking because you are making an ass out of yourself by demonstrating you do not know your own class, another class, a fight, your audience for perverted sexual comments, or by digging the hole that your mouth got you into deeper and deeper and you can tell by the tone of her voice that you had best chill out for a while do you:

A. Stop talking?

B. Start explaining why you were saying what you were saying thereby digging that hole of shame deeper?

C. Argue and insist that you are right even though you have no clue why…you are just convinced you are indeed right?

D. Whisper the GM for the next two hours explaining in great detail how it was not your fault that you upset someone/were wrong/didn’t understand what “stop talking” really meant?

E. /Gquit and bash the guild in trade chat?


The answers to these and many more questions go through my head as I assemble raids. Now you know and can prepare accordingly and save us all much grief.



Sincerely,

Your Positively Giddy with Anticipation GM, Lark




* Seriously? And then you complain you don’t get in a full raid? Seriously?!?!

** Yeah…that one got some strong encouragement to move his main to the alt’s guild…in the form of a /gkick.

***I’d really like to meet this friend. I’m sure we could have a very entertaining conversation. Very.

****Yes, yes you are a special snowflake in so many ways. Good luck next week when there’s competition for that raid spot you sort of filled.

Big Dead Dragon

About damn time and yay!

Stupid Awards of the Week

The I’m Not a Tank but I Play One on TV Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The DPS warrior who hit Challenging Shout instead of Battle Shout on Saurang and got one-shotted. Incoming wipe….


The Yeah but I Didn’t Mean Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The rogue who /gquit to join (what he thought was) a better guild…which then folded in a week. And now he wants to come back. After saying bad things to many, many people in the guild. /Sigh


The I Can Haz Deeps Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The shadow priest applicant who couldn’t tell me why he would be a good addition to the guild, what his haste cap or hit cap were, or really anything about shadow priests and raiding. L2 do homework.


The It’s All About Me Award of the Week goes to…

The DK who AFKed in the middle of a boss fight with no word. On a fight where we really needed him. And he would have been the deciding factor in downing the boss…or not as the case may be. When asked why he didn’t say anything he said, “Oh, I guess I could have…”


The But He Loves Me Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The hunter who quit raiding, despite being extremely good at the game and really wanting to play, because her boyfriend didn’t like her talking to anyone but him. Don’t you hate the stupidity that comes with being a teenager?

Stupid Awards of the Week

The Gkick Me Please Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The idiot hunter who, despite knowing he was skating on thin ice due to having recently broken guild rules and insulted many guild members, decided it would be a great idea to make an ass of himself in Trade Chat. Once I had plowed through the whispers, chat logs, and in-game mail from the various people he pissed off I felt it was best to part ways. /Gkick


The Old Noob of the Sea Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The mage who kept complaining in gchat the fishing daily was taking way too long. Reason behind this: he was trying to complete Disarmed in the Frozen Sea. You know, where it was months ago. Patch notes FTW. Same mage complained later the same week about the fishing daily taking way too long…because he was in a raid group. Bless his heart.


The Oops Award of the Week goes to…

/drumroll

The various morons in my guild who clearly don’t think that if they plot, plan or speak against me I won’t find out. Seriously, people, eventually the GM hears everything whether you like it or not. Think before you speak, nooblets.

Rant Day

Have I mentioned lately how much I loathe the Stupid Debuff? No, really? Well let me be clear….I REALLY, REALLY FUCKING HATE IT!

How is it that otherwise sensible raiders can die to frost bombs? There’s an ice tomb to stand behind for a reason! And dragons, heaven help me, how does one forget after months in ICC and dragons in almost every raid, that they cleave! And have bad breath! And, oh yeah, the tails will knock you into next week!

Why, oh why, people do you stand in green slime on Putricide? We have clearly established that it does not give you a lovely buff.

I say at the beginning of every Blood Queen fight, “If you can’t find your bite target for whatever asinine reason then bite ANYONE but DO NOT get mind controlled!” So, help me understand the mind controls?

Oh, right, healers, bosses on ICC Heroic mode….they hit the tanks harder! And my darling off-tank…pop your freaking cool downs more! Don’t wait for the emergency that may come your way, I’ve got news for you, it’s an emergency NOW!

Lastly, let’s just take the word “lag” out of our vocabularies, please. If you fuck up then just be a man about it, admit it, and move on. If I hear lag used as an excuse one more time I may hurt someone. Even if it is lag tell me something else. I don’t care to hear it anymore.

Why We Wipe

Bittersweet Change

You may have noticed references to the Princess in various posts and a few people made comments on the post last month about a guildie crossing lines. He was supposed to be my partner in the guild. I won’t be having those exact issues anymore. Princess left the guild and the server.

After many, many conversations and arguments in which I can honestly say I tried my hardest to make things work out it boiled down to too much history he was unwilling or unable to let go of and move forward from. Both of us have been way too defensive with each other for a long time and that opens the doors for miscommunication. The differences were I was willing to let go of the past and he wasn’t and I tried to keep our differences from having a negative impact on the raids and the gulid and he didn’t. One of the guildies summed it up well when she said, “If Princess wasn’t happy no one was.”

I’m truly sad in many ways to see him go. We were friends for a long time before we ever started playing together in Heroic. I can still remember teaching him the Malygos fight back when that was still the big thing. However, this has been a long time coming and, in the long run, I really think it’s for the best.

So far the guild doesn’t seem too shaken up. I’ve sent them mail to make sure they know that I’m here and nothing changes. The officers have met to figure out what to do with the few pieces he handled and to replace his class/spec. Just your standard damage control. Most of the comments I’ve heard have been along the lines of him being moody, grumpy and not himself for quite a while. I’m sure they won’t miss the delays in raid so he could have temper tantrums either.

I think the biggest mistake I made with this whole situation was attempting to have a co-GM. I know some guilds make it work but the way the game is set up structurally there really isn’t a way to truly make someone else of an equal rank. There will always be one person with the final controls. When new people come into the guild and need to know who is who they will sort by rank. It didn’t help that I’m MT and raid leader most times too. I think he wanted more respect based on rank but never really carved out a defined area in which to demonstrate his expertise and earn the type of respect he wanted from the raiders. When it comes to guild management I’m an admitted control freak so I have to see what someone can do before I will let them loose to do it.

So, I’m a little sad, a little angry he left the way he did, and whole lot relieved that the tension and misery are over.

Stupid Awards of the Week

The I’m Not a Blonde But I Play One on TV Award goes to…

/drumroll

Our drunk hunter who repeatedly buffed her pet with Intell Scrolls while complaining in vent that she wasn’t getting the Intell Buff. Said hunter logged on the next day and complained she couldn’t figure out where all her scrolls went. Some people should probably not drink and raid. Ever.


The Yeah, I Should Probably Just Server Transfer Award goes to…

/drumroll

The priest who applied to one of the few guilds more progressed than we are on the server and bashed our guild on the application. We have a good relationship with that guild. We read their website. We talk whenever anyone we know applies to either guild. We are not stupid. The priest clearly is. Apply elsewhere if you must but don’t bash the guild you’re in. /Gkick.


The You All Can’t Stealth Award goes to…

/drumroll


Each and every one of the idiots who are absolutely positive they can dodge the evil Val’kyr patrolling the Upper Spire and proceed to pull the damn things, cause a loooooong drawn out wipe because we’re spread all over the instance, and then proceed to try again to run straight through the next time.



The They All Looked the Same to Me Award goes to…

/drumroll

The druid who, when told on Blood Queen to bite one of the trees, got mind controlled because he repeatedly tried to bite the treants. Really. I can’t make this shit up.

It's About Damn Time Arthas Died

Oh my god I'm so glad it's over for this week. Bring on hard modes! Long overdue death. And the bastard didn't even drop my tanky weapon.

Cataclysm Raiding (Or How Blizzard Royally Screwed the 25 Man Raid)

I’m one of the folks who take a look at patch notes, expansions, class changes and the rest of the panic inducing things Blizzard likes to throw out there to send the masses into a frothing frenzy and simply shrug. Meh, change happens, we’ll make it work. I don’t panic and if Blizz decides they want paladins to tank with tap shoes on while holding a barbeque fork and garbage can lid in Cataclysm then, by golly, somehow it will all work out. I can’t imagine changing my main to another class so I’ll adapt.

Pretty zen, right?

That was all before I found out that Blizzard is fucking with the one thing in this game that has made me log in damn near every day for a couple of years now: Raiding. Specifically 25 man raids. Yeah, yeah…I’ve read the blue posts, hell I read every page of the 330 page forum thread http://forums.worldofwarcraft.com/thread.html?topicId=24401856405&sid=1 as it was developing, I understand the theory that sure you can still run 25 man raids but holy hell could Blizz be making it any harder to maintain that kind of raid group?

In any 25 man group there are people that:
A. Love the larger scale of the event

B. People that are there because the loot has always been better

C. People who would prefer to run 10s solely but all their friends are in 25s

If you take away the better loot the team will lose group B. If raiders have to make a choice between 10 or 25 in any given lockout you’re going to lose group C. This leaves group A sadly running 10s because there simply will not be the staff to do more.

If they want to cater to the strict 10 man guilds, the casuals, and the whiners who want easy-mode all the time they could go back to TBC style raids where a raid is either a 10 or a 25 not both. Gear is already way too easy to come by as a fresh 80 and is seldom an indication of skill anymore. I don’t want to see the game lose the last thing that offers a challenge to those of us want to work harder. Blue posts can say all they want that they will make the 10 and 25 raids of equal difficulty but it just isn’t that simple. It will never be as hard to manage a 10 man guild and raid team as it is to manage a 25. Once they post something like this chances are it is going live. I can hold out some small hope they might listen to the community but odds are definitely against it.

In the mean time while we wait to be sure I’ll keep doing what I’m doing for the guild now and mentally making a list of the raiders I do and don’t want in my 10 man guild in case I don’t quit the game altogether.

Blood Queen's Reign is Over!

Not bad, in my opinion!

I promise I will write more soon...Stupid Awards need to be done, there's bitching to be had, and I'm absolutely disgusted with the 10/25 shared lockout coming in Cataclysm.

Professor Down!

Last night we finally got Putricide down on 25! And, as the picture says, I will change the tabard for them. Recently it's been a vile combination of browns and greens with vials on it. Putricide themed don't you know!

We spent Wednesday wiping endlessly on him and I was prepared for a sudden influx of "something's come up" and to not have 25 on Thursday since they knew we were headed right back to him. Happily I was wrong. Our veteran raiders are estatic and I'm pretty impressed with some of our new recruits' stamina and determination even if there are some skills to refine. Showing up is the biggest part in my book...well, unless you are permantly stamped with the Stupid Debuff in which case we'll show you the door.

Later last night we knocked out Blood Council - farm boss - and spent some quality time with the Blood Queen. We made some decent progress and I think if we had not hit the end of raid time so quickly we would have had her.

Tonight its back to LK on 10...he must go down...please don't make me walk into another week of Marrowgar on regular mode!

Stupid Awards of the Week

The Flask on Hot Bar Bad Award goes to…

/drumroll

The tank who consumed 4 Stoneblood flasks in a boss fight because he put them on his hot bar where his cooldowns used to be


The Wait, What Did I Tell You? Award goes to…

/drumroll

The priest who changed his story about why his performance was low depending on who he talked to. If you are going to make excuses for bad performance don’t change the excuse you’re offering when you talk to different people. Does he think we don’t talk?


The Look Ma, I’m Special! Award goes to…

/drumroll

All the people who bought the Starry My Little Pony mount to show off their uniqueness


The Why Don’t You Just Gkick Me Now? Award goes to…

/drumroll
The priest and warrior who decided it was a really brilliant idea to ask the GM and Princess to go to TOC 10 and then give much, much sass and attitude about raid rules and loot rules - which were not standard - because “it was THEIR run” while carrying a brand spanking new 80 druid friend


The Left, Right, Left, Wait, Which Way? Award goes to…

/drumroll

The druid in ICC 10 who repeatedly wiped the raid by running ice tombs into the raid group on Sindragosa. Repeatedly. /facepalm


The I’m a Pally! Award goes to…

/drumroll

Me! For trusting a new update of Pally Power and not checking to see that for sure, for really really sure, I had Righteous Defense up before pulling Sindragosa…and then yelling at the dps for pulling aggro (and people say I never add myself here!)


The You’re a Pally! Award goes to…

/drumroll

A certain rogue who shall remain nameless for telling our warrior tank to drop consecration and use hammer of righteousness in her explanation of a boss fight (and she says she was looking at me at the time…I am hot after all!)

The Enforcer's Guest Post

/wave

I’m your friendly neighborhood rogue. Aka: ‘The Enforcer”. Yeah that’s right …/flex. Anyways Lark has been hinting at me writing a guest post on her blog. Well, I’ve been procrastinating for two reasons: 1. I’m horrible at typing. 2. I’m horrible at writing. So far 2 of 5 delicious combo pts.


Anyways this whole enforcer dealio started as a joke. Our guild was (I mean the casters – including healers btw /rollseyes) getting our faces PWNed by malleable ooze on Professor Putricide. So I send Lark a tell, “Can I be GM for a day? So I can kick these bads?” Little did I know she’d like the idea.


The night goes on and a list begins to form:

• Stand in shit that wasn’t there before…GKICK!
• Don’t switch from boss to slimes….GKICK!
• Somehow miss seeing giant green oozes flying at you…Also somehow miss blaring DBM warning telling you your going to get hit if you don’t gtfo….zomfg GKICK!
• Ask what an A-bomb is…GKICK!
• Stand in place so the orange ooze eats your face…zomfg GKICK!
• Run into the middle of the raid when you are the ice tomb…4 times…GKICK!
• Ask what the boss does after you’ve been in on kills 7 times…GKICK!
• Don’t suck up to me…GKICK! I mean…ummm…

You see where this is going don’t you? Now I enjoy smoking the green so I don’t exactly remember how many threatening whispers I sent to Lark or what was said before I logged on to a new guild rank: “The Enforcer” - Badass.


So where are our raiders’ brains? Probably the same place as my offhand dagger.


Take it from behind,

Bre

(Note: The Enforcer hasn’t actually been allowed to /gkick anyone…yet. We’re going to call them out, demand less Stupid Debuffs, and let The Enforcer scare the hell out of them for a week or so first!)

Lines in the Sand - Part II and Updates!

I appreciate the input on the situation with the over-the-line guildie. In the end we did talk about the things that were said and the behavior that has been disrupting progression. I think, I hope, that I have made it very clear that this is the last chance before something has to give permanently. /fingers crossed

This week’s Stupid Awards were taken by one person - who so very much deserved a spotlight - but there are soooooo many in the wings it’s going to take a few days to come up with the Epic Stupid Awards!

We have been recruiting - Is it again or still? Does it ever stop? - and I’m hoping to do some housekeeping soon. Sounds cold-hearted, I know, but damn…seriously? Do you really want me to go through the entire explanation of raid assignments again because you were messing with iTunes?

More to come soon!

And….

Maybe….

Just maybe….

A guest post by the new Guild Enforcer!

That’s right! Lark’s employing muscle! Be good!

Stupid Awards of the Week

The Hey, I Just Bought My Toon on eBay! Award of the Week goes to...

/drumroll

Anthealde, the pally "tank" who clearly hasn't looked up anything to do with paladins since TBC.

Ok, I wouldn't usually call someone out so blatently but this is just a prime example of someone who doesn't do the slightest bit of homework. I really thought he'd just forgotten to change gear when this started...little did I know....

Seriously....?

Yup, seriously.

Zomg.

I needed that giggle.

Lines in the Sand - Part I

What would you do if someone in your guild crossed those lines you just don’t want to go anywhere near? The deal-breaker lines. The lines that separate what’s acceptable to say and what’s not. The lines that if someone crossed with your mother or sister or wife would mean you would wind up in a fist fight.

What if this person became derogatory towards you as a woman and insulted your current lifestyle in a public chat? What about referring to the people you raid with and play with everyday as pixels to justify your lack of consideration for their time?

What would you do?

Science Class

Gotta love Tuesdays!

I’m all caught up on blog reading - found some new ones today too. Spent some time at Wow.com watching videos and perusing other class changes coming (tomorrow is pally day!).

I also dissected the guild today. Go ahead, picture that frog splayed out on the table looking at you with his beady eyes, the feeling was very similar. Ugh.

Out of 45 active mains in the guild 20 of them landed on this list:

• We know you will be gone because you were kind enough to let us know your work/life schedule changed and we’ll welcome you with open arms when you return

• You’ve always been flaky about attendance and you just moved to the side of the roster where we’ll let you raid if no one else wants to

• You’re new…shouldn’t you be making a better impression?

• You’re emo

• You’re name looks familiar and I’m pretty sure you used to be here every day…alien abduction?

• I’d like to /gkick you but you’re friends with the Princess

This leaves us with the following raiders - and includes 5 new recruits that I’m desperately hoping live up to at least some of the expectations - to form the bulk of our M-Th raiding team:

• 2 Tanks - Me and one who is completely untried with us (cue the scary horror movie music here)

• 15 DPS - 2 of which have solid tanking off specs and 2 of which have solid healing off specs

• 8 Healers - 4 of which have strong DPS off specs

Now remember, today is Tuesday, so I fully expect to see somewhere in the neighborhood of 35 people on for the weekly loot piñatas. So here’s the GM/RL dilemma:

Do I….

• Make sure to save absolutely everyone to ensure the reset raiders can’t pug later in the week? /cackles maniacally

• Only bring the new “core” to give them the best shot at upgrades? (Particularly since we are relying fairly heavily on duel speccing?)

• Ask for volunteers to sit like we usually do? (This is boring for the people who sit and I know they do it to be nice but I really hate it for them.)

• Pretend I’m suddenly deaf, mute and illiterate and ignore all whispers and set up the Dream Team?

What would you do?