Thoughts, ideas, bitching and bragging about World of Warcraft, raid and guild leading, and whatever else comes to mind...filled with the things Lark wants to say to her guild but probably shouldn't.
At least not to all of them. Not yet anyways....
Our dear little huntard, who after a few wipes due to the off tank dying on heroic Lich King to shambling horrors, hears me say, “He should have been able to take one of the hits if the other was tranqued and (our hunter) was doing that right…?” And she responds with silence. Very long silence.
The Oh, The Ready Check was for Real? Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
Same huntard, same fight, same phase. Ready check green, tank says, “Board’s green, starting it.”, raiders started calling positions and events and I hear….
“(The hunter) is AFK.”
In a Shadow Trap of course.
Then we hear in vent, “Oh, we were ready? I tabbed out…I thought someone was going /afk.”
You. Hit. Yes. To. The. Ready Check! /facepalm
The WTS Man Candy for Raid Spot Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The mage who included a picture of himself (is it really? Lol) clad only in a towel with his application to the guild. We usually just ask for WWS or raid history… I wonder what he would post for epics….
The But There’s a Tree for It Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The mage who informed me that Frost is a viable raiding spec. He went fire again very shortly after that statement.
The Nerd Raging Loot Whore Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The ret pally who showed up to raid in holy gear/spec and then decided to heal without telling me despite the fact that he was A. in the DPS group, B. not listed when I named the healers for the night, C. not needed as a healer, and D. had never healed in any raid I’d ever run and given his lackluster performance as DPS would not have been asked to heal. He then proceeded to roll on a healing ring against MS healers and nerd rage when he won the roll and didn’t get the ring….because it was his OS. He stated that he didn’t need anything for his ret set and that’s why he was healing - for the gear. I replaced him and he /gquit. I should have kicked him one of the many other times he showed up on the Stupid Awards. /Sigh.
The What’s Aggro? Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The lock that died. That died a lot. The lock who died a lot because he didn’t listen to the tank clarify the aggro changes. (**edit: I was just reminded this need to be co-awarded to a certain chicken!)
The Hiding from the GM Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The priest who has not logged on his toons since I told him I wanted to speak with him. I guess he knows he’s in trouble...like I’m going to forget if he hides for a few days. Pfft.
The Illiteracy Sucks Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
Everyone who whispered me, cornered me in vent, or sent me ingame mail asking what our plans were for Cataclysm after the post went up on our forums, my blog, and was the sole subject of the guild’s message of the day. You make me want to redirect all my energy into reading programs for nerds.
The Illiteracy Sucks MOAR Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
Everyone who did not do their homework on what the patch did and now has stupid questions they should know the answer to and proceeds to announce their slackiness to the world in gchat and trade chat.
The ret pally who repeatedly (yes, repeatedly) ran TOWARDS the orange ooze on Putricide. We did not down any bosses that night unless he died in the first minute. Seriously.
The Amnesia Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The resto druid who, when asked to go Boomkin, says on any fight - including Faction Champs - that she has healed over and over and over again, “I’ve never DSPed this fight…now what do I do?” I can see maybe (MAYBE) having a question if you go from say priest to rogue on Sindragosa but really unless you have amnesia you ought to be able to do farm content when going from heals to caster. /facepalm
The You Hurt My Epeen Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The Mage that got demoted to Special Snowflake for trying to kill the raid group - yes, on purpose, with forethought - and then had a temper tantrum about his rank and refused to raid until it was “fixed”. There’s a reason you were a Special Snowflake and you just made it more appropriate. /golfclap
The Gullible Isn’t in the Dictionary Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The pally who was told that to leave an arena team you typed: /gquit 2v2. And he did. He is also a Special Snowflake.
A warrior, a tree, and a ret pally who seem to be incapable of sneaking off to pee or grab a drink or whatever it was without spending an additional two minutes prior to the actual AFK to tell us in great detail why they must step away. I don’t care! Just go! You could have been back in the time it took you to explain why you needed to go!
The Magellan Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The ret pally who asked for a summons back to ICC after a wipe. He was in Dalaran. No, he didn’t hearth. He…took…the…wrong…portal…. Wait. What?! How do you take the wrong portal and wind up in Dal instead of the Upper Spire…? They’re not even close…how do you…but…wait, what….!? /headdesk
The Ass-fire is Bad? Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The kitty that sat in melee with purple fire coming out of his ass and then ran through as many of the healers as possible. Not once, not twice, but every freaking time he got it. All I can figure he was mesmerized by BQ’s fangs.
The BQ’s Bitch Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The hunter who got mind controlled every single solitary time he was due to bite someone. Every time. Every single time on Friday. And then Monday, learned to use shift+V. Voila! Success! /facepalm
The You Clearly Didn’t Want it That Bad Award of the week goes to…
/drumroll
The mage who linked for an item a good 4 minutes after the loot had been decided. His excuse? He was dead. Cause you can’t see raid chat when you’re dead…?
The I’m Not a Tank but I Play One on TV Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The DPS warrior who hit Challenging Shout instead of Battle Shout on Saurang and got one-shotted. Incoming wipe….
The Yeah but I Didn’t Mean Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The rogue who /gquit to join (what he thought was) a better guild…which then folded in a week. And now he wants to come back. After saying bad things to many, many people in the guild. /Sigh
The I Can Haz Deeps Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The shadow priest applicant who couldn’t tell me why he would be a good addition to the guild, what his haste cap or hit cap were, or really anything about shadow priests and raiding. L2 do homework.
The It’s All About Me Award of the Week goes to…
The DK who AFKed in the middle of a boss fight with no word. On a fight where we really needed him. And he would have been the deciding factor in downing the boss…or not as the case may be. When asked why he didn’t say anything he said, “Oh, I guess I could have…”
The But He Loves Me Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The hunter who quit raiding, despite being extremely good at the game and really wanting to play, because her boyfriend didn’t like her talking to anyone but him. Don’t you hate the stupidity that comes with being a teenager?
The idiot hunter who, despite knowing he was skating on thin ice due to having recently broken guild rules and insulted many guild members, decided it would be a great idea to make an ass of himself in Trade Chat. Once I had plowed through the whispers, chat logs, and in-game mail from the various people he pissed off I felt it was best to part ways. /Gkick
The Old Noob of the Sea Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The mage who kept complaining in gchat the fishing daily was taking way too long. Reason behind this: he was trying to complete Disarmed in the Frozen Sea. You know, where it was months ago. Patch notes FTW. Same mage complained later the same week about the fishing daily taking way too long…because he was in a raid group. Bless his heart.
The Oops Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The various morons in my guild who clearly don’t think that if they plot, plan or speak against me I won’t find out. Seriously, people, eventually the GM hears everything whether you like it or not. Think before you speak, nooblets.
The I’m Not a Blonde But I Play One on TV Award goes to…
/drumroll
Our drunk hunter who repeatedly buffed her pet with Intell Scrolls while complaining in vent that she wasn’t getting the Intell Buff. Said hunter logged on the next day and complained she couldn’t figure out where all her scrolls went. Some people should probably not drink and raid. Ever.
The Yeah, I Should Probably Just Server Transfer Award goes to…
/drumroll
The priest who applied to one of the few guilds more progressed than we are on the server and bashed our guild on the application. We have a good relationship with that guild. We read their website. We talk whenever anyone we know applies to either guild. We are not stupid. The priest clearly is. Apply elsewhere if you must but don’t bash the guild you’re in. /Gkick.
The You All Can’t Stealth Award goes to…
/drumroll
Each and every one of the idiots who are absolutely positive they can dodge the evil Val’kyr patrolling the Upper Spire and proceed to pull the damn things, cause a loooooong drawn out wipe because we’re spread all over the instance, and then proceed to try again to run straight through the next time.
The They All Looked the Same to Me Award goes to…
/drumroll
The druid who, when told on Blood Queen to bite one of the trees, got mind controlled because he repeatedly tried to bite the treants. Really. I can’t make this shit up.
I appreciate the input on the situation with the over-the-line guildie. In the end we did talk about the things that were said and the behavior that has been disrupting progression. I think, I hope, that I have made it very clear that this is the last chance before something has to give permanently. /fingers crossed
This week’s Stupid Awards were taken by one person - who so very much deserved a spotlight - but there are soooooo many in the wings it’s going to take a few days to come up with the Epic Stupid Awards!
We have been recruiting - Is it again or still? Does it ever stop? - and I’m hoping to do some housekeeping soon. Sounds cold-hearted, I know, but damn…seriously? Do you really want me to go through the entire explanation of raid assignments again because you were messing with iTunes?
The Hey, I Just Bought My Toon on eBay! Award of the Week goes to...
/drumroll
Anthealde, the pally "tank" who clearly hasn't looked up anything to do with paladins since TBC.
Ok, I wouldn't usually call someone out so blatently but this is just a prime example of someone who doesn't do the slightest bit of homework. I really thought he'd just forgotten to change gear when this started...little did I know....
I haven’t done the Stupid Awards of the Week for a while…partially slacking and partially that once I had a chance to look back on the potentials they just seemed sad. That being said I just have one for the week.
The OMFG Did You Seriously Think You’d Get Away with This Award goes to…
/drumroll
The former guildie who applied - and was accepted I might add - to the guild under an entirely different toon.
In our defense, it had been many, many months since he had been in Heroic and, quite frankly, we aren’t all that good about naming all our current guildies voices in vent if pressed!
Let me elaborate. Once the mage that went through the interview process was accepted we immediately moved into raid invite mode - for which he was accepted given that we are trying to replace the reset raiders - and the whispers started. “Isn’t that one of _______’s toons? “, “Who is that? The name/voice is familiar.”
I whispered the “new” mage and said, “There are some people here who think you are ________ ….”
He responds with, “Yeah, I am but I didn’t think you’d let me back in on my main.”
To which I replied, “Well, duh, you left on bad terms and tried to recruit people from out guild to go with you!”
At which point he was given the option to leave with dignity to be /gkicked.
Really?! Recruiting isn’t enough of a pain in the ass without re-recruiting!?!?
Random players on Nesingwary - they targeted me as a raid boss with focusing gems on the steps of the Dalaran bank for at least 20 minutes while players I don’t even know played out an entire RP raid scenario…on a non-RP server. Including blowing Heroism. (Ok, it was kind of funny and they were clearly bored. Lol.)
The Shouldn’t You be Farming Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
Me. For standing on the steps in Dalaran long enough for that to happen while doing nothing but /tells and talking in vent.
The Homework is Sooooo Boring Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The 80 paladin who thought if he didn’t use the right color gems in his sockets he would not get any of the gems properties. /sigh
The Let Me Tell You a Story Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
A particular lock and druid who persisted in giving long, drawn out explanations of how they died (or how they didn’t know how they died) in vent during Dreamwalker 25 - which is a very vocal fight for calling out mobs. This despite being asked to be more succinct. Seriously, just don’t die. Repeatedly.
The holy pally who let us know he was tired and logged out less than two minutes later in ICC 10. And we were doing well! At least give some notice so we can replace you…with a hunter.
The AFK Raider Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The priest who showed up for 1/3 of the25 man raids he was supposed to this week, 2 hours late for his ICC 10 and proceeded to pester me about when he could get in a raid for the next 30 minutes when he finally did log in. Seriously?
The “Did He Really Just Say That!?!” Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The pally tank who, when given his directions for Dreamwalker (again) after a wipe led to this conversation:
The warlock who was told it was against guild rules to pug ICC 10 before Sunday and went anyway! When called on it he said, and I quote, “You can’t tell me what to do” and left the guild.
Stupidest Waste of Flask Time Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll
The druid who left raid to hop on an alt to buy buff food for another druid who came to raid unprepared!
And the OMG I’m a Greedy Dumbass Award of the Week goes to…
/drumroll Nomoremana, the level 38 warrior, who rolled Need on a +spirit cloak against my level 40 priest in Uldaman…because it was blue.
Lark is a Holy Pally on a PVP server that’s home to quite a few good guilds and a whole lot of trolls. She has healed or tanked for more than 5 years through end game content in some amazing guilds. She used to be GM, Raid Leader, and Main Tank of her own guild...now she does as she's told in someone else's guild. Mostly. Well, sometimes.